Monday, May 13, 2013

Podcasting a blog that really delivers

The most common complaint I hear about this blog has nothing to do with content, length or clumsy construction.

No, it has to do with delivery. 

“Yeah, I signed up for the e-mail notification and it never comes through,” yet another friend said just the other night. “What am I supposed to do if I want to read your stuff?”

You’re safe to presume none of my friends are resourceful members of Seal Team 6.

If they were, they’d know you could simply click directly onto the blog every other day or so and something fresh will appear. I blog about 700 words a day four or five times a week. 

I know some people who check in just about once a month or so and I’m perfectly fine with that, too. Unlike old milk, most of the stuff doesn’t spoil.

Another option: they could follow me on Twitter or friend me on Facebook. It’s on those two venues where I announce and link new posts with the redundant cacophony of a rooster announcing each new dawn.

Of if it really, really bugs you and you really need to know the instant a new post appears, get in touch and we’ll work out a system where I text or call you with a one-ring signal letting you know -- ta! da! -- time for another office goof-off!

Still too much trouble?

How about this: I’ll sit in your car with you and read my blogs aloud.

Well, sort of.

Yes, I’ll soon be announcing a podcast.

Well, it might be a PONDcast.

PONDcast because the spoken word blogs will be produced right here above The Pond, the Latrobe tavern beneath my shabby little office, and because the impetus comes from a friend of mine who happens to be named Pond.

That’s Andy Pond.

He’s a fan and suggested my blog would be perfect for a podcast. He thinks people would enjoy downloading iTunes versions of me reading my blog aloud so they could listen in their cars, while jogging or doing other domestic duties.

I was skeptical until last month when I heard from an Ohio cleaning lady who called after she’d gone to her local library to check out an audio version of my book -- and there’s about five factual elements in that sentence that still strike me as surreal. 

She called out of the blue and said she wanted to buy a copy.

“I loved it! I was cleaning one house and I was listening to your book on my iPod. I was laughing out loud the whole time. It was just so funny!”

It’ll sound odd, but I have to say I was a little turned on. It’s not my voice on the audio book, but something about her statement made me feel like I was alone in there with her in some stranger’s house amusing her while she was dusting and scrubbing toilets.

The only thing better would have been if the Ohio maid told me she was dressed like a French maid.

I told you it would sound odd.

But her and Andy’s comment led me to investigate the logistics of podcasting. Of course, I was immediately overwhelmed. I didn’t feel as bad when the guys at the Apple Store Genius Bar were, too. They had no idea.

The only person who was more confused than me and the geniuses is probably my long-suffering wife. When I told Val I was going to immerse myself in another no-pay endeavor and that this one involved me talking out loud more, the look on her face led me to believe I’d have to tackle her before she began repeatedly slamming the basement door on her skull.

I have about 20 posts recorded and am seeking a local geek who’ll spend an afternoon with me getting the thing ready in time, I hope, for the blog’s fifth anniversary on May 23. 

So if you have any suggestions about how I can get a podcast linked to my blog or know of someone friendly who’d be willing to assist, please get in touch. I’m all ears.

At least until May 23.

Then if all goes well, I’ll become more mouth.

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