"Us" movie & the perils of genius

(674 words)

Val and I walked entertained, but bewildered from the movie theater. We’d just seen the highly regarded new Jordan Peele horror flick, “Us.”

The movie is a huge critical and commercial success with 94 percent of Rotten Tomato critics declaring it a solid winner.

Val said she was eager to get on her computer to read informed explanations about what the hell happened in the movie we just watched.

I was eager to get back to the bar and warn fans of coherent movies with logical conclusions to avoid “Us.”

Now is the time when considerate writers stop to warn: “Spoiler alert!” We do this so we don’t ruin what happens in the movie for those who want to see it without taint. They don’t want us to say what happened.

Spoiler alert! I have no idea.

It was artfully done and I was entertained, but I’m becoming increasingly irritated by what I consider lazy storytelling like I saw in “Us.” 

A truly great movie ought to have an ending that puts a bow on a compelling story.

For example, I knew at the end of “The Big Lebowski” and “Smokey and The Bandit” that bowling would remain an essential part of The Dude’s life and that The Bandit’s next mechanized mayhem would involve a trip to Boston for some tasty clam chowder. 

Spoiler alert! I often lapse into dim-witted facetiousness.

But my point persists. I didn’t need scholarly explanation and both films were highly satisfying. 

A better example is another well-regarded thriller by another director regarded as a cinematic genius. 

I could go into murky plot details but it would waste your time. And, really, I need just four words to to secure your attention.

“I see dead people.”

That’s it. That’s the whole plot. Most of you know I’m talking about “The Sixth Sense,” the 1999 best picture nominee by M. Night Shyamalan.

It’s a near-perfect thriller that succeeds in ways Peele’s “Us” does not.

First and foremost, it has a terrific plot that makes perfect contextual sense. It’s complex without being incomprehensible. It makes more sense after subsequent viewings. I suspect “Us” won’t hold up at all. When “Sixth Sense” is over, you feel more intelligent, not less.

In fact, the only question I had after watching M. Night Shyamalan’s “Sixth Sense” was did the M. in M. Night Shyamalan stand for Mid.

Spoiler alert! It does not. The M. stands for Manoj, which to me is too bad ‘cause I think MidNight Shyamalan sounds way cooler.

I suspect Peel’s next movie will be even more incomprehensible than “Us.”

Blame the perils of normal men or women being declared geniuses when they’re actually just about above average. Tell someone that he or she is a genius and colleagues and critics become apprehensive about challenging the genius’ views. 

Agreeing with the genius associates you with genius; disagreeing with the genius puts you opposite of genius.

That makes you an idiot.

Pretty soon, the careless genius is unable to even act with crucial self-doubt. That, I suspect, is why “Us” is so flawed. Here come the “Us” spoilers:

Because no one said, “Jordan, babe, why didn’t the girl just run away? Yeah, the spider kid adds creepiness to the film, but it’s just a senseless distraction. And the whole Hands Across America thread is utterly preposterous.

“Now, I’m no genius, but a nice tidy ending would be having these tethered whatevers climb into a black Trans Am and race up I-95 North on a quest for clam chowder.”

I suspect Peele is in for a scalding backlash and his career will follow the same rocky trajectory as Shyamalan’s has. It took him 15 years and a string of stinkers to resume his success.

You may wonder if I fear being on the wrong side of so much critical acclaim, that I fear my projections will lead many to dismiss me as a rube, a buffoon, a cultural boob ignorant of Hollywood's future as well as its past.

Spoiler alert!

Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.

Related …

“Lone Ranger,” “Grown Ups” & what’s wrong with Hollywood

1993, Hollywood’s best year

Oscar’s bore, movies suck

Tom Hanks: Actor, man, verb

Sandra Bullock & the laws if romantic “Gravity”

Fall movie previews

(1,147 words)

The temperature outside Sunday felt like I imagine it feels standing barefoot on the surface of the sun. Another day at home seemed confining so Josie suggested she and I go see a movie. I loved the idea, but was ambivalent about the options. Robert Redford’s “A Walk in the Woods” was released to middling reviews and I hate it when my theatrical heroes disappoint me.

I loved the Bill Bryson’s book, but I’m one of those writers who encourages writers who are less accomplished than me and disdains all those who aren’t.

Bryson certainly fits in that category. He’s a fine writer and seems free of the kind of obnoxious pomposity I’d love to acquire if I had even a whiff of his acclaim. So I was reluctant to go see a movie about him that starred the still-charismatic Redford as the author.

But how bad could it be?

Well, it wasn’t at all bad. In fact, to hell with the reviews, it was very enjoyable.

It was a great buddy movie with lots of jovial laughs. It was a little distracting to see Nick Nolte, who looks incapable of walking away from the catering truck, acting like he’s toughing out a 2,100 mile hike.

And I just love going to the movies.

Heck, I love going to see the previews of the movies.

Good thing, too, because they last about 20 minutes.

As the kids are back in school, Val and I now take in more movie matinees and are hoping for a good season of adult movies, I mean, er, mature movies.

Here’s some of what’s being released with requisite snark. If one out of every five of these promising sounding movies is worthwhile it’ll be a miracle.

• “The Intern,” starring Robert DeNiro and Anne Hathaway looks interesting. I thought of DeNiro during “A Walk in the Woods.” He was in one of my favorite buddy movies, 1988’s “Midnight Run” with Charles Grodin. It’s one our great swearing movies and was one of his first comedic roles. I loved him in “Meet the Parents,” but refused to see him in all the increasingly lame-looking sequels. “The Intern” looks like a good fit for him. 

• “Everest,” is based on the 1997 Jon Krakauer book, “Into Thin Air.” And what a book it is. It’s Krakauer’s account of being on the mountain during the ill-fated ’96 ascent that killed 8 climbers and left most everyone else with so many frostbite losses that standard hitchhiking became impossible. It’s an incredibly harrowing tale and I only wish it had been released this week where I could have enjoyed an temperature differential between what was outside and what was on the screen of about 120-degrees. Stars Jake Gyllenhaal, who is increasingly becoming one of my favorites since the darkly satirical “Nightcrawler.” Plus, he’s filmed several flicks in Pittsburgh and always says nice things about the city.

• “The Walk,” starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Val and I have loved him ever since he played Tommy in the uproarious “Third Rock from the Sun.” He plays Philippe Petit, the French daredevil who in August 1974 achieved what has been called the “artistic crime of the century” by stringing a cable between the Twin Towers and performing a 45-minute high wire act a quarter mile above the ground. The trailer is so dizzying I predict people are going to boast about having the guts to sit in a theater and see it. I hope to be among them.

• “Black Mass,” is the Whitey Bulger story. It’ll take euphoric reviews for me to see this one. First of all, I already saw the Whitey Bulger story. It was called “The Departed,” by Martin Scorsese and starring Jack Nicholson, Matt Damon and Leo DiCaprio from 2006. It’s very compelling. “Black Mass” stars Johnny Depp and I’ve vowed I won’t see another Johnny Depp movie until I can recognize Johnny Depp. His penchant for absurd dress up leads me to believe his next career move will be to achieve off-screen animation. So, no, I doubt it.

• “99 Homes,” starring Andrew Garfield. Based just on the trailer, this looks really good. Garfield stars as a man whose home is repossessed by a corrupt real estate mogul — and, oh, how I wish I could say it’s Donald Trump. To get his home back, the character must go to work for the mogul and begin evicting families just like his.

• “Love the Coopers,” is a Christmas movie starring John Goodman, Diane Keaton and a very appealing ensemble cast. I knew it was filmed in Pittsburgh, but I didn’t know it would include idyllic shots of the Ligonier’s town square. It’s featured prominently in the trailer and was a pleasant surprise. To my recollection, it’s the first major motion picture to feature Ligonier since “Slap Shot” when players on the team bus pulled down their britches and mooned protesting locals — and I’ve lost count of the number of times I wished I could have done just that in downtown Ligonier. It looks fun and charming with the kind of tense family dysfunction that is what Christmas is all about. Barring lousy reviews, we’ll see this one.

• “By The Sea,” starring Brad and Angelina Jolie Pitt. How a movie starring two people named Pitt (and probably a squad of their children) wasn’t filmed in Pittsburgh hints at inept production. I’d see a movie starring this power couple if it was about the two of them dishing about the other, but I’ll never see one where they’re acting like they’re either in love or about to kill one other, or are robbing a bank. Trying to gauge whether there is any real chemistry between the two will be too distracting to sit through. I once thought Pitt had a chance to be great — like Robert Redford/Paul Newman great — but he’s been a major disappointment (link below). No chance. In fact, I intend to one day argue in this space that our finest screen performer is the woman who plays Flo in the Progressive Insurance commercials. Have you seen her range?

• “The Martian,” starring Matt Damon. This looks like a good one to me. Did you see Damon in “We Bought a Zoo.” He’s becoming the anti-Pitt. He looks like he makes movies because it’s fun. It shows in his movies.

Others of interest include “Learning to Drive,” with Ben Kingsley, “Captive,” about the “Purpose Driven Life” book, and the Ron Howard adaptation of the Nathanial Philbrick sea-going tragedy book, “In the Heart of the Sea.”

I strongly recommend both “The Descendants” starring George Clooney and “The Way Way Back” starring Sam Rockwell. Val’s been urging me to see both for about year. Both, written by Nat Faxon and Jim Rash, are smart, funny and poignant as apparently are both Faxon and Rash.

Related . . .

Fall ’11 movie potentials and Joseph Gordon-Levitt

Shout outs for three (sorta) silent movies

America’s greatest actor is … John Goodman?

A Brad Pitt-y party

Let’s all America go to the movies!

Roger Ebert movie “Life Itself” more than a movie

“Lone Ranger,” “Grown-Ups 2” & what’s wrong with Hollywood